Tuesday, March 10, 2009

And Now I Shall Die

I have a drawer that houses my snacks. Low carb stuff. Nothing great but it's there. I come in each morning, open a breakfast bar. Have another bar around the middle of the day and one more some time around dinner time. Daily. My drawer always has between 5 and 20 bars. I'm always adding to the drawer.

Well, I had my apple thing for breakfast and a granola bar for lunch and I was hungry so I stuck my hand in to grab a snack and the wrapper was torn open. So I threw it out and grabbed another.

and another

and another

and another

fucking things were all opened and gnawed on. little tiny teeth marks.

a fucking mouse

I'm ill. My stomach is doing flip flops. A fucking mouse. I'm going to get the plague and die. Ugh. Fuck, I'm already starting to foam at the mouth. I'm rabid. I'm a goner.

Here Lies Floogin McNoogin
He Ate Mouse Food
Now He's a Dead Dude.


Someone You Don't Know said...

My brother was eating cereal from the box once, and suddenly the box moved. There was a mouse in it.

He didn't die.

It is pretty disgusting though.

Here's a thought...maybe it was a rat, not a mouse.

Floogin McNoogin said...

it's small. has to be. it was, apparently, spotted by one of the morons who works for my brother in law.

thanks for sharing, asshole.

I once made myself oatmeal, had the whole bowl and went to make myself another round saw meal worms in the mix. I puked. A lot.

Been close to 15 years since I have even entertained the thought of oatmeal.

Anonymous said...

ok..Freak me out.
I keep bars of various kinds on a shelf under my computer. Breakfast lunch, and snacks.