I'm So Tired

It's that time of year.  Deadline fast approaching and I'm working seven days a week, 12 or more hours a day.  Sure, the reward is good, money rolls in but I have to make pension contributions and pay taxes for the current year and my wife spends money better than anyone so the reward is really short lived.  To make matters worse, I miss out on all the fun shit my kids do each weekend.  Yeah, sometimes their activities can be boring and a total chore to attend but the athletic stuff is a blast.  I'm not one of those dads who gets into fights on the sidelines but I don't sit quietly on the sidelines, politely clapping when the kids do something good.

I enjoy myself at these things.  I help with the coaching if needed and, if it isn't needed I'm giving the kids tips and advice when the coaches aren't.  Even at 8am, it's still something I look forward to.

So, this time of year, I miss that fun and the random things that happen afterward.

Last Night I Joined "The Club"

25 years ago, a film came out that managed to hit home for kids all over the world.  That movie went on to become one of the defining films of a generation and, somehow, managed to continue to reach out and touch high school and college kids for the next two decades.  Last night, in celebration of the release of this classic, a screening was held in NYC.  In attendence were four of the five primary stars.  They were there to honor the man who created the film, and a multitude of classics before and after this film.  Kevin Smith was on hand to moderate a question and answer period after the screening and then, all those that ponied up for the VIP passes, were invited to a private party at a night club where the stars went to mingle with the guests.
The film?
The Breakfast Club.

A Great Way To Start The Day

I started physical therapy this morning.  I was expecting an agony filled hour of pain, sweating and suffering.  Instead, I had the most relaxing hour.

It doesn't hurt that the therapist is a rather cute young lady.

As The Thumb Turns

I had the stitches from the second surgery removed today and it was a total relief.  So much so that I actually watched as the blue thread was pulled from my skin, ignoring the icky visual and the stinging pain, all the while thinking "now I can enjoy the use of my left hand again."

Well, shocker, the thumb is stiff as fuck, swollen as hell and not very useable.

Reason #62 Why I Love NYC - Gratuitous Nudity.

Only in New York can you go to an art opening for a client and run into a naked, painted woman. 

Dealing With a Deaf IRS Agent

Ok, let me preface this by stating that this is not a knock on the handicapped in any way, shape or form but, rather, a knock on the hiring practices of those trying to help the handicapped find work in their preferred field.

A client of mine, an estate, has been having an issue regarding a refund.  Long story short, the IRS issued the refund in the wrong name and it was returned by the post office.  Then, when we tried to get it reissued in the right name, they said they needed proof that the executor was, in fact, the executor.  We provided court documents, letters testamentary, and figured all was right in the world.

We were wrong.

The Vacation, Bookended By Hell

So, last Sunday I packed the family off for our annual week in Montauk.  We started out by hitting my sister's house to say farewell to my niece who is headed off  to college.  While we were there a storm of biblical proportions moved into the area.  It poured for hours.  So, we decided to ride it out a bit.  Figured we'd hang at my sister's until it let up a bit.  Around 11 the insanity lightened up to a downpour and we set out for the next stop, my parents' house, where we'd crash for the night before making the trek to Montauk.

About 20 minutes into the drive, the ridiculous rain resumed and my wipers apparently couldn't keep up with the rain.  A blade came loose, the other blade overlapped with it and suddenly my wiper blades were bent and useless.

So, I called BMW roadside assistance and my wife called AAA.  Since we were on a highway, we had to be towed. 

3d Porn? The Next Rocky Horror?

That's right, three dimensional porn is heading your way and not just for the stupid fucks who purchased a tv for the home either.  No, right now a Chinese dude is directing a 3D porn flick for Imax.

Giant motherfucking pop off the screen porn. 

And I'm horrified by it.

Random Musings

My thumb is slowly mending.  I miss being able to use my cell phone with both hands and I am still suffering the humiliation of needing some assistance when buttoning my shirts and pants but all should be restored in another 3 weeks when the pin comes out, the splint comes off and I can get back to hitchhiking left.  In the meantime, the day's been an odd one.

Surgery And The Loss Of The Thumb

Friday was surgery day.  It went well.  Fast, painless, no big deal.  I left the hospital with a dead arm.  Literally.  It was hanging there, useless, swinging in a sling.  No feeling at all.  The surgeon told me it would regain feeling in about 12 hours and it would feel like a bad paper cut.

He was right.  Sort of.

My Left Thumb

Tomorrow is surgery day.  The first of two.  After about 3 weeks, I'll need to have a second operation to remove a screw that will be inserted to hold the thumb in place.  This means my vacation in Montauk is in jeopardy and I won't be able to get a waterproof cast for the first 3 weeks after the surgery.

This sucks but not as much as not being able to use my left hand in the manner I'm accustomed to.

Tuna Fishing and The Tale Of The Ruined Thumb

As detailed here, my son took me down and I wound up hurting my thumb.  How bad?  I'm having surgery on Friday to repair the damage.  Seems my fall resulted in my tearing a ligament in the thumb.  Class three tear.  If you're gonna do damage, might as well do it right.  Normally, this would be nothing more than a nuisance but I'm going tuna fishing tomorrow and the boats have been hauling in the fish so the odds are in my favor that I'll be working the lines and pushing my luck with the thumb.

Of course, to quote my surgeon "you already fucked the thumb up, can't do more damage to the ligament now so bring me some steaks."

Gotta love the guy for that.

The Jersey Show Is The Sign. The End Is Coming.

I've seen some bad shit in my life, horrific, embarrassing, reswallowing vomit type crap but nothing can hold a candle to The Jersey Shore.  MTV should be banished from the air waves for putting this crap on tv.  Even the State of New Jersey should be embarrassed to be associated with this tripe.  Seriously, the armpit of the nation, the only stretch of highway where, if someone farts in the car, you roll the windows up.

That's right, I said it, a fart's refreshing in Jersey and, still, this show makes them look bad.

Ruined Thumbs, Family Insanity and the Tie Dyed Dong

Lots of fun over a short period of time and my typing is is arduous thanks to a bit of horseplay with the boy.  End result, I managed to get blamed for more of my sister's insanity, I can barely use my left hand and my member looks like an extra from the show Hair.

The Girl On The Corner

An ode to the asian damsel in distress.

What Have I done?

So I had some server issues and, in the course of getting things fixed, I learned that my employees computers were all screwy thanks to their internet surfing.  So, I did what any good employer would do, I put in all kinds of security measures.

And, in the process, I removed my ability to surf for porn.

Floogin Andretti and The Peeping Tom

I went to my wife's college reunion this weekend.  20 years out of college.  Man she's getting old.  (Mine is next year, I'm a kid).  We took the kids with us for a weekend of fun with the kids during the day and college debauchery at night.  Boy did we over-estimate the fun factor.

He Pukes, He Scores

My son has a friend who's father has some serious connections.  Not only is he connected in the music world and the entertainment industry, he's extremely connected in the sports world.  So, when the father told me he was going to take a few of his son's friends to a Yankee game, complete with locker room meet and greet, I was thrilled.  I hate the Yankees but, a chance for my boy to meet Mo, Jeter, A-Roid et al is fucking cool.

Add to the mix, the guy's new wife is hot.  Megan Fox hot.  She's actually been stopped on the street by people thinking she's Megan Fox.  She's so Megan Fox hot that she's playing Fox's sister in an upcoming movie.

So, how did my son manage to destroy these connections in one fell swoop? 

He puked.

Sex Toys

I was out with friends the other night and one of them tells a story of his night in a Vegas brothel.  He went there for a bachelor party, no intention of actually doing anything with the hookers but, as the night went on, he was prodded by one particular lady, to accompany her up to her room.  Once there, she convinced him that a blow job would be a nice, simple way of getting off without spending too much money.  He agreed, pricing was discussed and the games began.

Grizzly McNoogin and Sex and the City

I grew a beard.  It wasn't intentional but the reaction has been surprisingly good so, for now, it stays.