Celebrity Train Wrecks

Last night I sat down to watch some tv and there was nothing on. So, I flipped thru the channels and came across Celebrity Rehab. I'm hooked. These z level celebrities are even more pathetic than the ones who strip down to their skivvies and prance around half naked on celebrity fat asses or whatever it's called.

In Rehab, a group of celebs enter a rehabilitation facility for their drug use. They've got home video of them all doing drugs. Seriously. They showed them snorting coke, smoking crack etc. Who the fuck videotapes themselves doing drugs? Why? For what purpose? Are they smoking crack and thinking "shit, we should tape this so I can use it when I go on celebrity rehab?"

The tapes themselves are fucking pathetic. One of the "celebrities" last night was shown smoking cocaine with his father. I kid you not. Is there anything lower than smoking cocaine with your dad in a van?

Yes, there is.

Letting your dad shoot you up and then fucking him which is what one of the "celebrities" did. Repeatedly. McKenzie Phillips is on the show and she fucked her pops.

The so called celebrities were a nice mix of has beens, nobodies and never weres. The aforementioned Phillips, Heidi Fleiss, The former bassist from Alice in Chains (smokes with dad), a woman who, apparently, dated Roger Clemens, Dennis Rodman and another dude who was deemed a celebrity although I never found out who he was or why he was deemed famous.

These folks are interviewed by Dr. Drew and the interview is interspersed with video of their lives, their fame, their background, their downfall and their current, mostly pathetic existences.

Heidi Fleiss is a meth head. She copped to getting tweaked the same morning as she entered the facility. She looks like you'd expect her to look. She's gone way downhill from her heyday as a hooker and that is a pretty sad thing to face. She now lives like a hermit, surrounded by parrots. She was beaten by her former boyfriend, also a (former) celebrity rehab inhabitant.

Phillips was clean for ten years before moving on to heroin. Impressive.

Rodman? Not sure what his deal is but he's pretty much the same embarrassing clown he was when he got married in a dress.

The bassist from Alice In Chains? He actually thinks he was famous and when he was tossed from the band he decided drug abuse, with his dad, would numb the pain of no longer being "the drummer from Alice In Chains." Seriously. I don't know the band, other than that one song they had that Beavis and Butthead made fun of on their show. I do know the lead singer was Layne Stanley and he died, of an overdose, I think. To be fired from a band where the lead singer eventually overdosed, you need to be a pathetic mess or a total asshole. This guy seems like both.

It is pure nirvana watching these losers talk about how they skipped out on prior rehabs because the places were filled with losers. Seriously, Heidi, you sucked cock for money BEFORE you became an addict and the business man with a coke addiction is a loser?

I'm never one to promote reality tv but this is something worth watching. Showcasing people, who were more infamous than famous and who are now so desperate to regain that infamy that they will go on tv and let the world see them for what they really are, is pure entertainment.

If you don't want to check out the whole show, watch enough to see Heidi Fleiss smile. Then come back here and tell me she isn't The Joker from Burton's batman.