Holy Crap!

OK, I cancelled my party the other day. I'm not sure why. Perhaps it was the idea of paying for my own party not being as much fun as, say, having someone just throw me a party. Perhaps it was the mounting cost that was starting to scare me. Perhaps it was just my hatred of birthday parties. Whatever the case, I told the wife I don't want it. She was upset. It means one less thing for her to do and that translates into get your resume in order sooner, rather than later. That isn't why I put the kibosh on the party but it is a welcomed side effect.

Anyway, the party is off.

Good timing too. Last night I'm going thru the mail and I see all these bills from the pediatrician's office and then I see one from the doctor who put me in the boot. I open the bills. Check it out, insurance has rejected every bill. I owe about $2,000 in medical bills. SuhWeet!!!

No, wait. Fuck me. What the hell is this all about.

I ask my wife what the deal was regarding her medical insurance coverage. She tells me that, until the severance package is signed and accepted, her former employer is not paying for insurance but, she adds, "cobra kicks in automatically."

Did you pay them? I ask.

No. They bill you retroactively, she tells me.

What? So, if we don't have any insurance claims, we don't pay for insurance?

No, we need to pay them.

When?, I ask.

I don't know, she tells me.

Ok, so, let's see, I just got tagged for $2,000 for a month and a half worth of medical and still, nobody has billed us for insurance. So, I ask, do you think NOW would be the time to find out what the fuck is going on with the insurance?


She asks me why I'm yelling at her.

I explain that I am not yelling at her but, having just shelled out close to ten grand for last month's spending and anticipating the 3/15 and 4/15 tax deadlines that will further thin my wallet, I really don't need to hear her tell me that we are, currently, running without medical insurance.

She agrees and tells me that she will take care of it first thing in the morning.

Then she runs through the list of reservations and dates with friends that she's lined up for the next month and then she sticks me one more time with the question "are you sure you don't want to have a party?"

oh, yeah, I'm sure.


On a side note, one of the geniuses at crapple spent 25 minutes looking at the bottom of the nano to determine that a piece fell out, then they spent 10 minutes trying to figure out if they can replace the piece, all the while my wife is telling the genius that they already told us it was going to be an exchange for a new nano. After a total of about an 45 minutes, she got the new nano.

I hit the genius bar after work. They don't serve alcohol. They do, however, have video monitors of blue's clues playing under the bar so that the geniuses are entertained during the 9 minutes when they don't have people lined up to fix their crappy apple products.